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"If they're not, they may feel deficient in some way or that something's wrong."But, he adds, "there are huge individual differences in sex drives and individual differences in sexual chemistry within relationships and all sorts of other things — job stress, kids — all sorts of things influence it.It would be alarming if people got too overly concerned with where they stack up in terms of frequency."The U. survey sample, which is not nationally representative nor randomly selected, is 89% white, 68% women, and 56% ages 35 and older."Probably at best, it tells us something about the white, probably better-educated, somewhat higher-income population in the U.What's "normal" and what's not when it comes to human behavior, sexuality and relationships?Researchers who solicited responses to an online survey of almost 100,000 people from around the world, including 23,000 in the USA, get at that question and more than 1,000 others in a new book called The Normal Bar, out Feb. Among their findings, based on responses from individuals 18 and older who are in relationships (both heterosexual and same-sex):-- 40% say they have sex three to four times a week.-- 48% of men and 28% of women report having fallen in love at first sight.-- 43% of men and 33% of women say they are keeping a major secret from their partner."This 'normal' is different from most normals," says co-author Pepper Schwartz, a sociologist at the University of Washington in Seattle.They’d heard about some students at Harvard who’d come up with a program called Operation Match, which used a computer to find dates for people. She makes Quiche Lorraine, plays chess, and like me she loves to ski. ” One day, a woman named Patricia Lahrmer, from 1010 WINS, a local radio station, came to to do an interview.A year later, Altfest and Ross had a prototype, which they called Project , an acronym for Technical Automated Compatibility Testing—New York City’s first computer-dating service. She was the station’s first female reporter, and she had chosen, as her début feature, a three-part story on how New York couples meet.

But as it turns out, they’re heaving shovelfuls of statistical manure at you.

A few years ago, OKCupid calculated that 96.25% of e Harmony’s profiles are inactive, using numbers provided by e Harmony themselves.

Match was only marginally better, coming in at 93.1% inactive.

What I uncovered were some harsh realities about online dating that no one ever talks about.

After the jump, some things you might not have known… Most of the member profiles you’ll find are inactive.


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