Dating a married man whose wife is dying

They are technically married, however the person they married is no longer "there" and in some cases, their spouse does not even know who they are.Taking care of a demented spouse can be much like taking care of a toddler because the person cannot be left alone or unattended and he or she cannot necessarily be reasoned with. More and more, these healthy spouses are only too relieved to place their ill spouse in a care facility in order to get their spouse a better level of care as well as to get a respite from caretaking.He says he felt terrible about it, but couldn't stop himself."I would go to bars with a group of friends, but I wasn't there to catch up with them - drinking with them was simply a preparation for the night ahead.

If he is truly interested in a long-term commitment, he will make an effort to be with you.

DEAR ABBY: I was in a seven-year relationship with a wonderful married man I'll call Hank. She died three months ago after a lingering illness.

A month after that, Hank suggested we date openly and talked as though we were a couple.

While these facilities help take care of one set of issues, the healthy spouse is then left at home alone and, in some cases, profoundly lonely.

For some, there is no question but that they are married, "for better or worse, in sickness and in health ‘til death do they part," and the answer is obvious that they will not seek out a new relationship.


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